Due date!!!!

I can't believe it's my due date day! I thought this day would never come! Time has gone by so fast, but yet so slow. Way back when I just found out my due date was February 11th it seemed in ages. From counting down the months, then the weeks and then days, February 11th has fiannly came, but where is the baby? I thought this day would never come, just because it seemed so far away, but the past week I didn't think this day would be relevant. I thought my baby would be here already. But I guess I thought wrong, I'm still waiting for the big day. 

I guess starting tomorrow I'll be considered over due, which seems so depressing for me. I'm thought hitting my due date would be the most exciting thing ever, but it's kinda of a let down. It's my due date now what? It's just another day of waiting, it's just another day of wondering will it happen today? And most importantly, when will it happen? 

So it's my due date now what? Now I have to make sure this baby really gets a move on, so my doctor doesn't decied to take matters in to her own hand. 

"Let's go baby you can do it put a little power to it!" Don't be scared to come out into the world, I'm here to protect you! I'll make sure it nice and warm and cozy for you out here. I'll give you plenty of food that you'll actually be able to eat on your own and not through some funny cord. I'll have a warm and fuzzy blanket for you, and a cozy spot for you to sleep. I'll do anything to make sure your as comfterble out here, as much as you are in there. See it's doesn't seem so bad out here, baby come and find out for yourself! I'll be waiting! 

Due date selfies!!

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Emotions emotions!

I'm feeling the jitters, it's really happening so soon. I can't help but to feel so many emotions, I'm feeling scared, worried, unprepared, nervous, anxious, joyful and of course supper excited.

I'm feeling scared for the unknown, the unknown of labor and what the pain is actually like. Scared of what will happen after the baby's is born, how will I react and how will I cope/manage being a mom. 

I'm ganna be honest, I'm worried that things mite not go as planed, nothing is in our hands and I'm just hopping that everything goes smoothly. I'm worried I'll b such a mess durning labor that I'll act like a crazy person. I'm worried that I won't have a clue how to handle a new born, no matter how much I think I know, and how much practice I got with my nieces and nephews it's no way near the same as doing it to your own. 

I'm feeling unprepared because I have nothing for the baby. My husband and I aren't buying anything till the arrival of our baby, which leaves us a big todo/to get list right when it's born. I know what I want, and what I need. I have made list after list of everything possible, but nothing feels satisfying. I'm not sure if it's the not buying things that's making me feel unprepared or the fact that you can never really be prepared of what will come. 

I'm supper nervous, and just have one to many questions on my mind. Will I be a good mom? Will I have a clue what I'm doing? What will my life be like with a child? What will my relationship with my husband be like? Will I hear the baby cry at night and wake up for it? How fast will I recover after birth? Will I...? Will I...? Will I...? The list goes on and on.

Duh I'm anxious all I have been talking about is how anxious I am to get this baby out of me. I'm anxious to just see what it will look like, and who it will look like. I'm anxious because I can't wait to just snuggle with my baby and love everything about it. It's tiny hands and feet, and it's little eyes, nose and mouth will be the cutest thing ever! 

Of course there not all worries and nervous, I'm so happy and looking forward for the day to come. I can't wait for that moment of meeting our baby for the first time. Holding it, and never wanting to let go, just thinking of it make me tear up. I'm feeling so so much excitement, love and joy already, I can't wait to really experience it. 

Only time will tell!

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Advise!

And the countdown contuies, I'm hanging in there! This waiting game is insane, the suspence is killing me. The fact that I have no idea when it will happen is driving me crazy. One mistake I made is, as soon as I turned 9 months I thought the day would come which made this waiting game seem all that much longer. Don't make the same mistake as I did, don't think it's happening so fast pretend like your ninth month is just like any other. When you past your due date, and the tenth month starts then you can start feeling like it can happen any day/any minute.

Beside for the anxiety, the sleepless nights has really taken a toll one me. I'm exhusted, I can't function anything that's why I didn't post yesterday and today's kinda boring. When I say sleepless night I don't mean, I went to bed late and got 5 hours of sleep. My nights consists of a maximum 4 hours of sleep and notconsistant. I'll sleep a half hour here and there, then twenty min, and if in lucky over an hour in a row. Iv been trying not to nap so I would fall asleep at night but that hasn't really been working, but today my body is crashing and all I wanna do is sleep. So back to sleep I go, and I'll keep all of you updated.  

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Hospital tour!

The count down continues, one week and one day left till my due date. I can't imagin what the day will be like, as many times as you try picturing it in your head,  nothing can really prepare you for the big day. One of the things I have been trying to get around to do is to take a hospital tour to feel more comfterble in setting when the time comes. I finally got around to it on this lovely snowy day, and it made me feel a little better. Most hospitals will give you the option to take a tour befor your big day, if yours does I recommend you taking it. It shouldn't take more then a half hour and it makes the picture in your head a little more realistic.

When I got to the hospital, I went straight up to labor and delivery where the head nurse meets you. She explained what will happen when I come on the big day. Every hospital is different some will want you to preregister or in like in my case will want you to fill out some simple information when you arrive. 

She then took us in to the labor and delivery room. She showed us what all the creepy looking machine are and they turned out not to be so creepy after all. She showed us how the bed detaches for when it's time to push. She explained to us the prossess of what will happen right after the baby's born, the kind of test it will be given and what will happen in case of emegancy. We were told how many people can be in the room with me. For every hospital is different, in my case it's two people of my choice. I asked if there is a CD player in the room and if I can bring a birth ball along with me, my hospital doesn't have a CD player but they do allow you to bring one with you, and they let to bring a ball. She showed us where the operating room incase its will be needed, and then where you recover after. 

She then took us up the maternity floor, where we got to see the nursery and the rooms. I was alittle disappointed, my hospital has joint rooms. She said you have to get lucky to get a private room, it all depends on the day you give birth, and how busy they are. But I'm very happy with everything else, I guess u can't always get everything. 

We asked her some questions we had and she was more then happy to answer anything we needed. I was really happy I finally took the time to go, I do feel a little more prepared/ready for the big day. For all of you that this is your first pregnancy, I'd say to go and check out the hospital. It made me be able to visualize the day in more of a realistic way. I'm not ganna lie when I first got there and saw the room I got a little nervous, like its actually happening any day now. I guess it was better to freak out now then when I get there for real. Although I probable will still freak out. I am so ready for the big day, I can't wait to meet my baby, it is so time for it to come!! 

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Linea nigra!

Did you noticed a strange dark line on your belly? Maybe you thoughts it was a weird looking stretch mark? The straight line that runs from your belly button down, or can even extend up words till your chest, is called the linea nigra. No one is really sure to why it happens in a straight line, but the linea nigra line is not dangerous and is actually very common in pregnancy. 

As usually, we have our hormones to blame for this. We have a hormones called hyper-pigmentation, that increase production of the pigment. If you get it, you'll notice the line in your second or third trimester, and will stay till after you give birth. It usually effect women with darker colored skin more than those who are fair skinned. It usually goes away on its own after birth, in some cases the color fades but the line might not disappear completely. But don't expect it to disappear right after you give birth, it can take awhile, I'm talking months not days or weeks. 

Because it usually goes away on its own, many experts say not to treat its especially during pregnancy or if you are breast feeding. There are creams out there that can bleach it, but they contain stuff that has not been proven to be safe during pregnancy and for nursing. How ever feel free to try them if your not nursing, who noes maybe they really do work.

If it brothers you that much and your looking for more of a home remedy to try, apply lemon juice on your skin, many women say the acid helps fade hyper-pigmentation. 

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Is it time?

Follow up on yesterday's post; my husband and I are both okay, thanks for all your messages and concerned questions. No I didn't go into labor because of what happened, my baby is still very much in me! If I did give birth, trust me you guys would know about it. We just all need to wait patiently. I'm 38 weeks today so I can still go for another 4 weeks max, but I'm hoping my baby arrives sooner than that. These sleepless nights and the inability to walk properly is getting kinda old, we are so ready. 

I was up all night (again) trying to get comfortable, but just couldn't find the right spot. When I finally fell asleep I was shortly woken by a big kick/movement, and I had to start all over again! You all know the bathroom routine, at this stage it's almost at every half hour, so it doesn't give me much time to fall asleep before it's time to get out of bed again. Last night was a disaster, I must have drunk too much, and I kept waking up to go, though usually I can sleep through it for at least 3 hours. 

It's past 1pm and I'm still lying in bed, it might be time to start my day, no? I'm so tired I can just go back to sleep, maybe after I post this I'll go get some brunch and go back to bed for a nap! It seems crazy how all I wanna do is sleep; I've become so lazy I don't want to do anything anymore. All I want is to go in labor, and even though I didn't reach my due date I feel overdue. I have been walking, cleaning, eating spicy food and other little tricks that people say to try to help you go into labor, but nothing is working. My baby is clearly not as ready as me, it hasn't got the memo yet that's it's time to go. I probably shouldn't be trying to make labor come already, I've still got time, maybe I'll take a break and just let it happen when it happens. It's not like we can control it anyways, the baby will come when it's ready.

Totally unrelated, one of the reason why today's post is up a little later then usually is because I sent it to someone to proofread. I know I suck at grammar and I'm sure all of you realized that by now, and I know it bothers some of you. Because I am awesome and listen to my followers comments, I am going try this whole proofreading thing and see how it goes. Let's see if you guys notice a difference, if you do please tell me because it will bother me that it doesn't sound like me. I have sent other posts to some editors but I didn't like it, when I was reading it some things didn't sound like things I would say. But I am giving it another shot for you guys, and if it doesn't turn out well, then can you guys do me a favor and pretend like my grammar is awesome?

Ok it's nap time now, I can barely keep my eyes opened. Hopefully my sentences make sense, or at least enough for my proofreader to understand. 

    Counting down the days! 

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What a night!!!!

We all have those crazy nights that make a crazy story, but for me what happened Friday night was on a whole nother level of crazy. I'll start the story from Thursday night, where I was up the entire night (literally) because I was feeling so uncomfortable. I called my doctor first thing in the morning and she told me to come in and get checked out. My doctor recommended I take Benadryl that night so I can get a good night sleep because I haven't been sleeping much at all these days. As much as I didn't want to, I knew I really need to sleep so I listened to her. 

Friday night I took the Benadryl, as soon as our meal was done I headed straight into bed and was fast asleep by 9. A friend of ours recently had a baby boy and the shalom vachar was not to far from our house, so my husband walked over. Would have been pererfect, while I am passed out on Benadryl he was out keeping busy. Like I said it would have been perfect but the Benadryl decided not to work all the well, yes it got me to sleep but didn't keep me sleeping for to long at all, I was wide awake at 11.

Doing the math on how long it would take to get there and back, and how long he would stay, I figured my husband should be home sooner or later, but the latest at 12:30. I waited bored and patiently in bed for him to come, 12:30 came but he didn't. So I thought ok maybe he's having a really good time so he stayed longer then I thought he would. But 1 am came and then 2 am and he still wasn't home, I didn't no if I should panic, but I did think it was very weird that he wasn't home yet. Maybe the Benadryl didn't keep me sleeping but it definitely kept me calm. 

I don't know how, but I managed to doze off again at around 2 something, but was up at 3:15am and he still wasn't home. Ok something was definitely wrong, I kept looking outside to see if I saw him coming, I kept imagining the door open and I would run to check but it was just my imagination. At 4:15 I couldn't take it anymore, the tears started to come and I started to really panic. I put on a sweatshirt, rain boots, a snow hat, and wrapped myself in a blanket from my waist down and went outside. 

I walked up and down my drive way, and checked all around the house, who noes maybe he was passed out in back yard for some reason. I'm usually a scaredy-cat and would be terrified to go out alone let alone go into my backyard, but some how I manged. I didn't know what to do anymore so first thing that came to mind was to get help. 

At 4:30am I banged on my next door neighbors house, they yelled from a window "who's there?" At this point I was balling "it's Chumy Herman from next door" they seemed alittle annoyed but who could blame them it is 430am "what do you want?" I started cring even more "I need your help" looking at me confused "ok with what?" "I need your help, I don't know what to do anymore, my husbands missing he never came home" finally there tone of voice calmed down, and they said ok there coming to open to the door.

I told them what going on, there first reaction was he's drunk and probably didn't want to walk home. But knowing my husband I knew that wasn't the case. Then they suggested that maybe he fell asleep there or he decied it was to cold to walk back. But I know my husband, the cold wouldn't stop him, and if he did fall asleep, I think someone would have woken him and sent him home to his 9 month pregnant wife. 

When I explained to them that something has to be wrong, there is no other reason he wouldn't come home, they realized and that something was up, it's been 7 hrs and I have no idea where he is. Keeping me calm (so I don't go into labor)  They told me to call Hatzalah so they can go out to look for him. So here's a twist to the story, my husband took his phone with him incase I needed to reach him, and it was time to go to the hospital. (with ravs approval of course) we had whole system planed, if he wasn't home in 20 min max then I had another number to call. 

When I told my neighbor they were like perfect, call him he could see you called and come running home, confused to why I have waited this long and why I didn't call him hours ago. They suggested I call from my phone and not there's so he sees it's me. The wife came back with me to make sure I was keeping calm and to make sure everything was ok. 

I call him but no answer (he wasn't supposed to answer he was just supposed to come home) we waited 15 minutes and still nothing. As I was about to call Hatzalah to send people out to look for him, he calls me back. I pick up in shock and in tears, "where are you!?? What is going on?!? Are you ok!?!" He sounded alittle bit in a daze or in his sleep "I'm in the emergency room, I fell on ice and hit my head really hard and split my face opened" I started crying even more, I felt so bad for him "are you ok?" He didn't sound like him self, "I hit my head they took me to make sure I don't have a concussion, I got a big cut on my face and a big bruise on my forehead."

I was glad he was ok, but confused to why no one came to tell me. I asked him why, he said he thinks he said I took Benadryl and I would be fast asleep, so no one should wake me, he doesn't remember. He hit his hard really hard, he said he think he was passed out alittle. People told him he was throwing up and acting weird, that's why they were concerned he had a concussion. Thank god though he doesn't have a concussion, but he has a big bruise on his forehead that is swollen. No stitches, just glue on his cut that goes from eye brow to eye brow. He got home at 6am, safe and sound. 

What a night it was for us, I still think it crazy. I'm amazed how I stayed calm till 4, and extremely embarrassed that I woke the neighbor at that hour. But I'm glad I did, I know it was the right thing for me tod o. God works in mysterious ways, it's a good thing he had his phone on him, otherwise there would have been search parts looking around for him. 

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